“The Wrong Alice”

I can’t believe it has been three months since my last review. I have honestly enjoyed spending my weeknights and weekends doing other things. But more to the point, the few movies I have watched we’re nothing I cared to write about. Plus I need a new bulb for my TV.

So, after a long drought, I’ve started to get the itch again. And I hate to renew my reviews this way but…

Alice In Wonderland
…good lord this is a terrible movie. As whacked out as it is, I’m a fan of the 1951 Disney animated version, and I’ve never seen any of the numerous other versions made through the years. So I can only compare it to the 1951 film, and there really is no comparison at all. Everything that made the original so good is not only missing in Tim Burton‘s attempt, but seems to be thrown out and mocked as if it should never have been there to begin with. All the craziness, the total lack of a plot, and the very important fact that Wonderland is not a place where Alice should actually be is very much the point of the story. But for some reason, Tim Burton makes Alice some sort of savior of Wonderland (now called Underland for some reason) much like the Pevensies of Narnia. Suddenly there is an actual story with actual characters that are interrelated. And Alice is now their friend? In trying to make sense, this story of Alice makes no sense at all.

Plus it’s just a bad movie. The story, even if it is out of place, is just plain boring as well. The dialogue is horrid and the acting is terrible (yes, even from Johny Depp). The only thing that may be good is the 3-D animation. But I did not see it in 3-D. In 2-D, it was average at best, and it was clear when I was supposed to be “wowed” by the 3-D.

From the reviews of others I had little expectations for Alice In Wonderland. Usually that’s a good thing and my experience is not as bad as others. Not the case this time. Though I didn’t expect it to be good, it was worse than I could have imagined and had me reaching for the fast forward button within an hour. But don’t worry I didn’t miss the Hatter’s dance. So terrible.

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